How to Become a More Confident Communicator

 According to most studies, people’s number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. 

Does that sound right? This means to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you’re better off in the casket than doing the eulogy. 

 — Jerry Seinfeld

By John Millen

Over the past 20 years, I’ve worked with more than 9,000 leaders, from frontline to CEO’s, and I’ve found anxiety about communicating creeps in for people at every level of organizations.

It's sad because feeling and exuding confidence in communication can be critical to their success.

With this in mind here are three tips to help you become a more confidence communicator:  

1. Confident communicators put their listeners first

Many speakers talk without thinking about the people listening. Confident speakers give deep thought to understanding their listeners. On virtual platforms like Zoom, this is more important than ever. 

What are their problems? What do they need? 

How can you help to influence their thinking, actions or behavior in a positive way?

Take Action: 

Before your next talk, write down how you can help your listeners.

Instead of focusing on yourself and your anxiety, adopt a service mindset to help your listeners. 

Ask yourself, “What do I want them to think, feel or do after our communication?”

2. Confident communicators are authentic

These communicators are open and risk vulnerability to share themselves with their listeners. They say what they believe.

They tell personal stories. As leaders, they learn to engage and connect with people. They find their own voice.

Take Action:

Think of the most important stories of your life and business.

Choose one and start telling it in conversations and presentations.

See how much more connected people will be.

3. Confident communicators connect with purpose

Confident communicators focus on purpose: theirs and their listeners’.

Most of us talk about what we do or how we do it, but humans are motivated by meaning, by “why” we do our work.

Being connected to your purpose and leading others through the purpose of your work is a powerful motivator.

Take Action:

Work to understand your purpose and why you are making a difference. 

When speaking with others, start with “why” before explaining what and how.

Taking small actions and seeing positive results is the best way to build your sustainable confidence over the longterm.